Well, it's sunday, the weekend is coming to a close. So why not take a trip down memory lane, and play I Remember When?
This week’s topic is:
“I remember when… I had my first boyfriend”. Did you hold hands? Go on ‘dates’? Or just hang around together with the crowd? Whatever your memories are related to your first boyfriend, share them!
Well, since last week's I Remember When went into my first crush being my first boyfriend, I'll continue and tell you about my first husband. *WARNING* explicit content!
So John and I finally called it quits in January of 2000. He was hanging out with some friends that I didn't like and treated me like shit. Instead of John coming to my defense he would just laugh at it. How wrong is that? Someone that is supposed to love and care about me is laughing at what his friends are saying?! Not. Cool.
I had met Juan, my first husband, while dating John. Never talked to this guy at all. Maybe just a hi when he would come to the house. (it was my cousin's house). After John and I had split, I noticed Juan checking me out. He was really quiet and shy. So innocent-looking (or so I thought...but more on that later). I asked him to take me to my friend's house. He obliged. As I was getting ready to get in the car, he reached over to the passenger seat to clean it off, but I was still getting in and didn't see him. Then it happened. He grabbed my ass! LOL. Such a typical male thing, huh? So we get to my friend's house, and we all decide to go see a movie. He bought everything! I thought it was really sweet. Then he took me back to my cousin's house. I went to bed. The next morning, he kissed me. We started dating then. I was living at my dad's which was about an hour from my cousin's, but he would pick me up on the weekends, and come to see me at my dad's thru the week sometimes. I was young and very naive. Valentine's Day he asked me to move to Las Vegas with him. Um, what?! I'm 17 years old! I can't do that! But I did do just that! I ran away from home to be with a guy that I had only been with less than a month. When we got out there, we all got jobs (his sister and her boyfriend came as well). I got injured at work, and needed medical attention. It wasn't anything serious. I had slipped on the floor and hurt my back. Before they could do x-rays, a pg test was needed. Ok, cool, that's policy. No need to worry, right? WRONG! I was 6 weeks pg with our daughter, and didn't even know! So I tell him. Was he excited like me? NO. He wanted me to have an abortion! I just couldn't bring myself to that to my *baby* a human life. So I ran away from him, and was gonna back home to Michigan. I was going to have that baby with or without him. Well, he agreed to keep it, and I went back. Then the drug use began. Not just your typical smoking weed. How about meth! It was recreational either, it was everyday! Then he started not coming home. I knew it was the drugs. That was out of my control. Jessi was born that December. He calmed down a lot in the beginning and was home all the time. Helping me with our daughter. But he fell right back into his cycle. I guess it was just something that I was gonna have to live with so our family could stay together. Like I said, I was young and naive. We married in October of 2001. Things were good, except for the drugs. I don't think he ever cheated on me bc he was too shy around girls. In January of 2002, he hit me. One and only time. I called my dad, he called the Las Vegas Police Department, who then showed up at my door. Juan came home on lunch from work and was arrested and taken to jail. I gathered up as much as I could and was police escorted to my mil's to get my daughter. I just thank God that she wasn't at home to witness me getting hit like that. I get my daughter and we go to women's shelter for one night. the next night i was on a plane home to Detroit. I didn't talk to Juan for almost 3 months. He didn't even know where I was at! Then I gave in and talked to him, just to tell him that me and Jessi were alright. The next thing I know, he's gettin on a bus to come be with us. OMG! So we get back together. Jasmine was born the next January, while he was where? Yep, you guessed it. In jail. But not for abuse. It was for warrants. So things are good. We're happy. Or so I thought. He was lazy. Didn't want to do anything! Including work! All he wanted to do was play video games and snort coke. I was the one working AND goin to school since I dropped out of high school to be with his stupid ass. I finally got sick of it and kicked him out in March of 2006. I got with Brian and moved with him to Kentucky in June. Juan was always welcomed here to see the kids whenever he wanted. He decided to go back to Las Vegas. Like he really needed that, right? So Brian and I both told him to stop here on his way so he can see the girls. Did he come? Nope. Did he call? eh, barely. Then in August, I get a phone call. His mom. Crying. There's been an accident. I have to call the hospital. All I get is, he's in surgery. Well, he died on August 7, 2006 of a self-inflicted gun shot wound to the stomach. Drugs in his system. Ruled a suicide! OMG how do I tell my kids this? They are only 5 and 3. School starts in 2 days! So I waited until the weekend. Brian and I both sat down with the girls that Saturday morning and told them that their daddy had an accident and he went to Heaven to be with God. It was a huge cryfest.